Author: Justin Bortnick

Name: Amelia Ipswach

Age: 28

Profession: Teacher

Hair: Frizzy

Nerves: Frizzy

Instrument: Piano

Sign: Capricorn

Role: The Factory

Sundry: Teacher of Linguistics and Home Economics at St. Hortense’s Preparatory Academy for Young Women.  Secretly dislikes the headmistress but is afraid to let anybody know.  Is currently single and not happy about it.  Has a furious knitting habit but is mortified that a young man might find out and deem her boring.  Enjoys children as long as they are well behaved.  Only speaks with her parents on birthdays and holidays.  Had higher hopes than the ones she achieved.  Smokes one cigarette a week and feels guilty about it. 

Name: Allouette Gendebine

Eye Colour: Green

Age: 12

Year: 6th Grade

Favourite animals: Spittlebug and Kiwi Bird

Sign: Aquarius

Instrument: Clarinet

Role: The Eyes

Sundries: Attends St. Hortense’s Preparatory Academy for Young Women.  Hates wearing school uniforms.  Favourite meal is spaghetti and meatballs.  Draws pictures of cows wearing hats in her notebooks.  Unusually observant, even for a young child.  Has played her instrument for six years but does not practice as often as she should.  Placed first in the school spelling bee but forgot the trophy in a classroom and never found it.  Better at snooker than a child of twelve has any right to be due to a parental-fostered interest.  Prefers all of her shoes to have buckles on them.

Name: Rufus

Eye Colour: Brown

Fur: Brown

Age: 8

Instrument: Barks

Sign: Leo

Role: The Nose

Sundries: Born in a litter of 6.  Was neither the dominant nor the runt.  Adopted by current as-yet unnamed family at age of 8 months.  Prefers his collars to be red but has no real say in the matter.  Will not chase cars because he realizes it is a dumb idea, still dreams of one day catching one.  Proficient at sitting, laying down, heeling, shaking, fetching (slippers and newspaper, which he paws through most days but only for the pictures) and tracking.  Self-taught in three of these fields but he won’t say which.  Prefers to be scratched just above the tail.  Secretly finds cat food delicious.

Name: Brian Gerald Sedgwick

Height: 6’11’’

Accoutrements: Eyeglasses

Age: 37

Instrument: French Horn

Preferred Meal: Roast Beef

Sign: Cancer

Blood Type: AB+

Role: The Researcher

Sundries: A writer but not one that you’d have heard of.  Skillful at his craft but does not care to publish.  Greying at the temples.  Dislikes include neckties and unkempt fingernails.  Independently wealthy via inheritance.  Employed by a university.  Students unsure what he teaches as nobody seems to have any classes with him.  Keeps a collection of glass ladybugs on a windowsill in his office.  Can hear punctuation.  Dating a girl at present without backstory, whom he met at a municipal event.  Has a weakness for brandy and tweed.

Name: Apple Martingale

Eye Colour: Shifting

Hair: Light Brown and worn in pigtails

Age: 19?

Favourite Colour: Flange

Instrument: Lyre

Sign: Virgo

Role: The Sun

Sundries: Lives in a commune-farm with her sixteen brothers and sisters who are not important enough to be named here.  Is a vegan.  Was homeschooled by her mother and father in the important topics, like how much moonbeams weigh, the proper mapping of ley-lines and how to step lightly upon the Earth.  Does not use contractions.  Likes to name inanimate objects.  Assumes that everybody is her friend.  Has a surprisingly expansive vocabulary.  Does not wear shoes unless absolutely necessary and sometimes even not then.  Unfailingly cheery to the point where it can be tiresome. Refers to the Earth as a “spaceship”.  Has a pet baby piglet named Spectropolis.  Cheerfully oblivious to reality.

I am going to outline ten characters that I will create over the next ten days, with one being posted every day.  These characters might be a prelude to something exciting!*

*No they won’t.

Today, a post that is about Current Events and not something esoteric.

I’m not a professional expert on Social Networking, but I’ve generally been good at calling the tech industry.  Here’s my latest prediction: Google+ isn’t going to be a thing that lasts.

Continue reading “Why Google+ is Silly and Probably Won’t Last”

Note: The following was originally posted on the old LordBlognStuff page on Sunday, April 24, 2011.  You may read the original article here.

Ladies and Gentlemen, I give you Mister Walter Disney

                                   

Note: The following was originally posted on the old LordBlognStuff page on Sunday, March 6, 2011.  You may read the original article here.

It’s a pity Blogspot doesn’t have a reblog feature.  I saw this at Hipster Runoff today, it is glorious for more reasons than I care to enumerate here.  I give you the Slarf:

                                        

Original Article: Is the Sleeve Scarf the next big alt fashion trend? R u gonna buy a slarf?